The Duo in the Darkness
13:00
“So what are we waiting for?” Deadpool asked. “When do we get to meet….the Daredevil!?”
The two were sitting in the sewers under Hell’s Kitchen. Bullseye answered, “Well the heroes have a kind of schedule and genre that they go after. Daytime villains include Heroes for Hire, Blackbolt, and Strange. But then Strange only goes for magical villains and Blackbolt sticks to Long Island with the terrigen. The heroes who come out at night are Moon Knight, Hellcat, and Daredevil. Spider-Man and the Punisher are the only ones who you can expect to appear at any time but Spider-Man’s the only one out of all to get the weirdo villains. Scientific mishaps.”
“Oh so Namor should take care of him.”
“Then who do you want to kill after this?”
“Eenie meenie minne Moon.”
“Okay. Then help me kill the Punisher after this. We knew of each other but that isn’t my reason. It’s just that nobody else seems to be able to kill him and he’s just a dude like me.”
“Benjamin, to me, you’re not just a dude. You’ve got a great cock-”
“Once the sun sets we will have to perform a ritual to summon the Devil.”
“Wait what?”
“To fight Daredevil, those of us in the Underworld know three rules. First, it must be nighttime, second we must harm someone, and that someone should not be quiet about it. Once we get some poor women to scream help, he’ll sneak us like he was always there.”
“Whoa, he’s like Batman.”
“Who’s that?”
“Oh you wouldn’t know him. Goes to a different comic company.”
“So we’ll take like a five hour nap I guess.”
“I mean, the big black cock is gonna catch up to us soon.”
“………Luke Cage? How do you know?”
“I heard him come down the sewer. He’s not been that quiet about following us. He’ll be here soon.” Under his mask, Bullseye was obviously shocked. “Oh I have the same heightened senses as Daredevil.”
“Sensations like Daredevil?”
“Yeha like echolocation, infrared sight, hound smelling-”
“Uh, he’s just a devil incarnate. Who can feel the evil in others. What are you talking about?”
“Okay who the fuck are you talking about!?”
Luke Cage was indeed catching up with them. Somehow, despite the branching paths of the sewers, his determination led him the correct way. He turned a corner and so was now heading down a tunnel that led to Hell’s Kitchen. He marched on, still full of anger. 30 feet behind him were three musketeers; Gena, Crowley, and Jake. Jake felt a buzz in his pocket as they turned the corner. “You guys go ahead, I have to take a leak.”
“Leak where you please! Hahaha,” joked Crowley.
“You nasty codger,” Gena said.
Jake returned back around the corner. He started to piss. He answered the phone with a British accent, “Marlene, how are you?”
The lover on the other side answered, “no Steven, how are you!? Did you see what happened on the news? On Wall Street?”
“Yes, Danny Rand was horribly murdered.”
“Oh my, it was so shocking to hear. He was the most queer mogul of them all but he was so nice! Not to insinuate that all moguls know each other but did you know him at all?”
“Marlene, you brainiac, of course the moguls have connections between each other,” Steven said remembering his war against the Committee, “but I did not know Danny too personally. He bought and sold some of my paintings and he was indeed very nice.”
“I see. So I hope you’re okay. I hope this is a one time case and other big names aren’t taken down either. Especially you.”
Jake’s phone made a noise that someone else was calling. “Thank you Marlene, I love you. But I must talk to you tomorrow, I have a busy day ahead of me. We’ll have dinner tomorrow.”
“Oh yes.”
Jake then switched the ear he listened to. He answered the next call with his regular voice, “Frenchie, what’s the sitch?”
“Marc! Mon Dieu, I have just finished workout and saw the news. Is that not our old mate from Operation Cerberus?”
“Yes Frenchie, and in fact I’m hunting him down in the sewers right now. But I’m with Gena and Crowley so Jake won’t achieve much. Jake just wants to see Bullseye in the flesh.”
“I understand. Allow me to circle the air in case he left the sewers. I’ll call you with updates.”
“Thank you Frenchie.”
Jake finished his piss right then. He came around the corner and caught up to his friends with a short jog. Returning to his New York accent, he said, “friends, let’s hurry up and warn the gentleman that we want to help him.”
Crowley responded, “I’m sure he’s too determined by his drive to be worried by us. But who wants to inform him?”
Crowley and Jake looked at the ceiling. Then they slowly gazed over to the flashlight holding Gena. She held one although it was not too dark in there. “What!? You want me to tell Luke just cuz we both black?”
“We said no such thing,” Jake replied.
“No way! I’m a black woman, he gon be a hell of a lot more protective if I tell him.”
“Let’s tell him together then,” Jake said.
When they did, announcing it in unison, he simply replied, “Don’t get in my way.”
Among the fanbases of these heroes, they have created myths surrounding them as none of them (excluding Luke Cage) have a PR team. As Bullseye explained to Deadpool, “there was once an average man killed by the crimes of New York. He was a man who kept his rage and that was the cause sending him to hell. There, he took his rage out on other demons before becoming a devil himself. The ruler of hell, Mephisto, then banished him back to earth to instead rage out on any person. But on his ascent, he was intercepted by the Archangel who instead instructed him to only take out his anger on those who commit evil. This would pay his penance so he would be allowed into Heaven. That man returned to New York ready to defeat crime lords and that man became the Devil of Hell’s Kitchen. That’s why he can appear whenever evil is committed, why he can sense your intentions, and why I would eventually have to end him.” This is a story most New Yorkers believe in as fact but it’s just their fan theory.
“Wow that was a lot of just shitty made up lore off the dome,” Deadpool responded. “You really believe in it?”
“Don’t talk to me like I’m the one weird person in the sewer. I’ve been possessed by a demon before and Doctor Strange very publicly fought Mephisto. A Devil of Hell’s Kitchen is understandable.”
“No wonder this story is non-canon. And conveniently, here comes the Power Man now.”
The tunnel they were in was about 15 feet wide with five foot walkways on either side. The water is also about 5 feet deep with a very slow current. There are ducts bringing in water from toilets on the surface. Bullseye and Deadpool were on either side of the water. They stood up. Bullseye loaded his pocket with bullets and Deadpool brandished his single sword.
“Wait, we still can’t hurt him,” Deadpool realized.
“Worse comes to worse, he won’t kill us. I can escape jail fairly easily.”
“Aw good, even more pain.”
Luke came charging at Deadpool first with a shoulder check. Then he threw him to the other side and jumped on Bullseye. Deadpool threw a grenade that Luke caught in between his hands. He gave a smirk as it harmlessly exploded there. Kicking Deadpool in the balls Luke then grabbed his shoulders and tossed him at Bullseye. Bullseye dodged the body and used a leg to throw Deadpool back. Luke wrapped his arms around Deadpool and then charged into Bullseye ramming the both of them into the walls.
Gena, Crowley, and Jake simply nodded. “Well it looks like he got this handled.”
“I think I saw a manhole cover a little bit back. Let’s leave this funky place,” Gena said.
They turned around to see Eddie Brock recording the fight. “What? Gotta get the exclusive.”
But anyways, Jake’s team left.
Luke pulled the two out of the hole in the wall and held them by their necks. “So what’s the deal? Why’d you two go and attack us?”
Bullseye looked over to Deadpool who just started girly slapping Luke. “We are mercenaries. We were simply hired,” Bullseye answered.
Luke tossed Bullseye to the ground and then stood on him with one foot. “Deadpool, you feel the same way? Stop hitting me.”
“I can’t. I found a spot that makes your head sound like bongo drums. Time to start jamming.”
“I’mma start jamming,” Luke Cage then started bashing Deadpool’s body across the wall. After several hits he said, “can’t seem to get a good groove. It’s crazy how you healed from before already.” Then he continued. Bullseye crawled over to the water and then leapt over to the other side. Sorry Deadpool, he might accidentally kill us. “Maybe I’ll just drown you until you quit.” Luke jumped into the water and pushed DP underneath. Holding him there, choking him, Luke felt a sense of release. Luke pulled DP out of the water and ripped off the mask. Eddie closed in. “What’s your name?”
Coughing some water out his throat, DP finally said, “some call me Slade.”
“No one calls you that. What’s your real name?”
Something was zipping down the tunnel. At great speeds, the sewer water exploded out–covering Eddie’s camera–and Namor came out punching Luke far away. Namor noticed Eddie and quickly knocked him out. “Wade! You idiot.”
“Oh thank God you came,” DP replied. He now put his mask back on. “I’ll never argue against black reparations ever again.”
Namor grabbed Deadpool by the neck, “Why did you have to take the first kill!?”
“We have to kill them sometime!”
“You could have just waited 30 minutes!”
“THIRTY minutes. You wanted me to stall him for THIRTY minutes before we killed Iron Fist? Who did you even kill?”
Luke rose out of the water. Somehow, his undamaged phone was ringing in his pocket. It was Trish so he answered.
Trish was on the shore of Rikers Island looking over the mutilated body of Jessica Jones. Jessica was her adopted sister and growing up with someone with super powers gave her desires to become a superhero. Finally, she received powers but only at the loss of her own mother. That’s what turned Trish into Hellcat. What will the death of Jessica turn her into?
“IT TOOK YOU THIRTY MINUTES TO KILL JESSICA JONES!?”
“IT WAS A DELICATE SITUATION. THE FIGHT WAS ONE MINUTE.”
“Do we want to retreat?” Bullseye asked the two mutants in sewage.
“WHO ARE YOU?” Namor screamed at him.
Bullseye then pointed to Venom which wrapped around Eddie regardless of his consciousness. Due to the lack of emotions, the Venom took a more monstrous gelatin form. “WHAT IS THAT?”” the mutants shouted. Then there was Luke who stood tall with a new anger in his eyes.
Namor felt his hand, “shit, they were right about Project Power Man. It hurt just to hit him that hard.”
Deadpool said, “Really? Hey, Luke Cage, did I say we killed Jessica Jones? I meant Jessie Jonas, the secret fifth brother.” Luke picked up Deadpool, “why always me!? Namor’s right there!” Luke drilled DP into a wall. The Venom monstrosity was now kind of standing up. Using a made up tentacle, it pulled Namor out of the water and slammed him into the wall on the other side. Bullseye started to back away as the mutants were pummeled.
Namor grabbed Venom’s chest and his arms fell through. Then he received a punch from a random arm. How strange. Sometimes this monster is fluid and sometimes its solid. But if it is fluid at all, it is under my control. Namor’s control over water is due to will power rather than any mutation or superpower. He gripped at the fluid part of Venom and ripped it off Eddie in a spin. Namor kept turning and turning, dragging the helpless Venom around. Looking across the way, he sent the Venom on Luke stunning the both of them. With great speed, Namor collected Deadpool and started running away. Bullseye looked over to Eddie who laid on the ground. Bullseye took out a single bullet and dropped it. Then his foot kicked the bullet, sending it into one ear and out the other of Eddie. Eddie’s brain started to leak out of his ears and nose. Namor then picked up Bullseye saying, “good move!”
Venom and Luke continued wrestling with each other. “Get off of me! What is this crap?” I am the Venom. It looks like my old friend is dead. I can help you Luke. “Heck no. You’re creepy as shit. You’re the thing that made Spider-Man evil when he was fighting the Sinister Six.” Evil? We won. I simply made him stronger. I will make you stronger with your anger. You feel for Jessica and Danny, don’t you? “Damn you,” Luke said, trying to smash Venom into the ground. They would wrestle for the next few minutes.
Above ground, the 3 musketeers returned to the Bowery. In the law office, Foggy Nelson was surrounded by piles of papers for all of the upcoming court cases. He looked over at Matt in the next room over. The blind lawyer then looked back at him. They both wore worried faces. Foggy shuddered as he saw a tear slide down Matt’s face. He was about to go join them but then a pile of papers fell on top of him. “Aw shit”
Logan and Kwannon turned the corner and came up the tunnel. “Hey bub- What the hell?”
“What are we going to do? He’s losing to black sludge.”
“Kwannon, things are very simple here. Is it conscious?”
“Yup.”
“Can you pull it away?”
“No. It’s too massive? I can’t describe it.” Venom then started to feed dopamine into Luke’s body giving him an edge in this wrestle. Eventually, the Venom took form over Luke’s body. “This is so gross to watch,” Kwannon said. The long tongue is an Eddie trait but here, Venom’s skin suit was more blocky and geometric. He still kept the spider symbol on it’s chest. “Maaaaaaan.”
Luke said to Venom, “Okay, I’ll use you for now, but I just need to capture Deadpool for the police. I still have important plans for tonight at Rikers.” Logan and Kwannon both could hear this with their heightened senses. They already swam away. And anyway here’s two bozos for your entertainment.
“Bollocks,” Kwannon said, hearing Venom’s thoughts.
Logan unsheathed the claws in his hands. Kwannon dropped the real katana to make purple knives in either hand. They are made of psionic energy meaning they are imaginary. Venom jumped at them but they split up. His hand punched into the ground and he turned, sending three tentacles at Logan. Logan hopped across the water and then slashed at the tentacles easily. Kwannon jumped at Venom’s back, slashing it open with the psionic knife. She saw the real back of Luke and reached in with her other knife but Venom’s mold pushed her onto the ground. She sat up and then was kicked into the air. Logan jumped across, slashing the leg into shredded black cheese. But that was just Venom’s flash, Luke was still undamaged. Venom came together to increase its right fist punching at Logan. Logan slashed at this but the punch still hit him into the ground. Kwannon then leapt onto the arm and ran across it. The mass of flesh grew little handles causing her to trip into the arm which wrapped around her. This would trap her in a cocoon in the extended arm. Venom brought this arm back as Logan stood up again.
Logan spit out some saliva and then took out his lighter. He quickly slid underneath Venom’s lighting his ass on fire. Logan then lept, as Venom creepily turned his head around, and slashed at the arm giving Kwannon a breath of air. The arm quickly closed off anyway. As Venom flew by, a new fist formed out of the abdomen punching Logan across the water. The fire quickly flared up across Venom’s back and then across the rest of the body. Suddenly, the venom cut off arm had hundreds of little purple knives pop up. You’d have to be psychic to see it. Kwannon exploded out of the arm and jumped across the water. The two stood and turned at the flaming Venom which reconnected itself.
“It’s not burning,” Logan said.
“It’s not burning,” Kwannon repeated.
Venom raised an arm which sharpened itself into a blade, “Black Luster Sword”. Then the fire spread to the blade causing it to glow red, “Surtur Edition”.
“That’s so fucking badass,” Kwannon said.
“That’s so fucking badass,” Logan repeated.
Venom jumped across the water. In truth, Venom was burning. But the symbiote feeds off the emotions of it’s user. Luke was so angry, Venom was able to produce more and more cells to be burned before it burned him out. And the cells would borrow a durability buff from Luke’s impenetrable skin. The Venom calculated it had a few minutes like this.
Logan and Kwannon raised their blades blocking Venom’s swing. The sparks flying did not bother them. The two then ducked and cut through Venom’s legs. Kwannon opened Venom’s back again and Logan reached in. He stabbed Luke’s back–horrifying the Harlem Hero–and pulled him out, throwing him across the water. Venom disheveled and drooped to the floor. It quickly burned away with the mass growing smaller and smaller. The fire grew smaller too, completely disintegrating it.
“It burned!” It burned, it burned,” they cheered.
Luke felt the strange new cuts on his back. They started to bleed. He was also exhausted from being possessed by the Venom. He didn’t feel angry anymore. Logan and Kwannon then kicked Luke against the wall. Luke stood up defensively, “h-how did you cut me?”
“If an unmovable object comes across an unstoppable force, one of them has to break. That’s why I was supposed to kill you, Power Man. Not Deadpool.”
“How…how do you know that name?”
“Because you’re Weapon VII. You’re documented by our government.”
“I came before you,” Kwannon said, almost excited.
“Wait…are you the same?”
“No, I was originally a psychic British girl who switched into the body of an assassin boosted by the VI serum which increases the physical and mental power of the person by a multiple of 5 at the loss of their memory. I still have my personality though!”
“Nah, what I went through was worse,” Logan said.
“It’s not a competition,” Kwannon replied.
Luke then pushed the two into the sewer water. He quickly ran down the tunnel, up the ladder, and out onto the surface. Conveniently, he was picked up by a taxi. Logan poked his head out of the manhole. “Fuck”.
tdwriter 